Why Seeing a Sex Worker Can Be Good for Your Relationship

Congratulations! By deciding to see a sex worker with your partner, you’ve already taken the very first step when it comes to improving your relationship. (I’ll get back to that point in a moment.) Before I can explain why a visit to a sex worker as a couple can be good for your relationship, allow me to put your mind at ease.

First of all, no, I’m not going to steal your husband. In fact, I want to make what the two of you have become even better. And no, I’m not going to violate your consent. As a professional, I’m not going to pressure either one of you into activities that make you uncomfortable. You set the boundaries and describe what you’ve always wanted to explore, and I create an experience from there. With that out of the way, let’s focus on what’s really important: how seeing a sex worker can be beneficial to your relationship.

1. It Can Heat Things up Between the Sheets

After many years of marriage, it’s only natural to want to explore something new. Variety is, after all, the spice of life. Sometimes this is his idea, other times it’s hers. Whichever the case, it’s a very normal and common thought to have.

By choosing to experience a professional threesome, you’re able to dictate what that encounter looks like—not to mention that you’re getting the benefit of a true professional’s expertise. For example, most couples aren’t familiar with safe sex practices for threesomes. This is where my professional experience comes in. We all get to have safe, legal fun together without any of the STI concerns of a threesome in other circumstances.

Variety can help couples learn more about their partner’s sexuality. Maybe you find a new kissable spot on his neck, or perhaps he learns exactly how you like foreplay. You’re setting the stage to learn more about your partner and allowing them to learn more about you too.

MORE: If You Haven’t Made a Yes/No/Maybe Sex List, the Time Is Now

2. It Helps Bisexual Partners Explore

Sexuality is something I always encourage couples to be open and honest about. If you have a desire that your husband isn’t able to meet by virtue of his sex, setting up a date with a legal sex worker is a great option. You both get to participate and explore those desires. Sometimes your husband just watches; other times he joins in. Simply communicate what your comfort levels are.

Sex workers aren’t just for men, ladies; we’re here for you too. When your subtle desires go unmet, they begin to weigh on your relationship, and as time progresses, that weight will only get heavier. Rather than allow your bisexual desires to hinder your relationship, instead use them to fuel an incredible experience you can share with your partner.

3. It Lets You See Your S.O. with Someone Else

This fantasy is much more common than you think. In fact, 30 percent of the couples I see are seeking this particular experience. You aren’t alone in your desire to see him with another woman. You also aren’t alone in your concerns about the other woman. Rather than putting your trust in a stranger, put your trust in an expert.

This can benefit your relationship in a number of ways. You’re getting to fulfill a fantasy for both of you at the same time. He, like most men, has probably fantasized about being with two women at some point in his life. You want to see him with a second female, but you still want to set the ground rules. Having a mutually pleasurable experience can give inspiration for future sexual encounters and create a starting point for dialogue about your sex life. Plus, you’ll both leave with fantastic memories you can look back on together. Shared experiences are a proven way to bring couples closer together.

MORE: Would You Be Happier if You Were in an Open Relationship?

4. You Learn How to Talk About Sex

I strongly believe that the foundation of any strong relationship is built with communication. This includes your sexual prowess. If you’ve never asked your husband how he likes his oral sex, you’re missing out on a huge facet of your relationship.

But starting the conversation is hard. Where do you even begin? My job is to help you both find the language you need to talk about sex to each other. All encounters begin with a conversation—one that both partners get to be involved in. We will chat openly about your fantasies, about your sexual desires, about how you liked to be touched and so on.

Once you’ve built those basic language skills with me, you get to take them home with you. And once you’ve started the dialogue, it’s easy to keep the conversation going. A great piece of advice I always give my couples is to set aside a night once a month when you purposefully practice your sexual vocabulary by having a conversation with your partner during a sexual encounter. Many female clients have reached out later to tell me their sex lives have never been so good.

MORE: How Being a Cam Girl Helped Me Own My Sexuality

5. You Improve Your Sex Skills

Have you ever faked an orgasm? Eighty percent of you just nodded your head. What if I told you that you’ll never have to fake an orgasm again? Wouldn’t it be great to have your partner know exactly what turns you on and precisely how you like to be touched?

Consider that my gift to you. I’ll teach him the sex skills he needs to get you off so you don’t have to. Most men simply have no idea how the female body works, much less how the female orgasm works. Much of my role in society is to fill the sexual education gap that exists in this country. I have the privilege of teaching sex skills in an incredibly erotic and fun way.

This works in reverse too. Have you always been curious about how to perfect your oral sex techniques or wondering which positions feel the best for him? Consider my bedroom to be your classroom. Let’s learn together.

Sex workers like myself have incredible skill sets that are both needed and desired by society. Much as visiting a dentist is good for your oral health, visiting a sex worker with your partner is good for your sexual health. Society has stigmatized sex to the detriment of us all. Fight back against that stigma by exploring, improving and working on your relationship in a sexy, fun way.