Everyone Is Trying To Figure Out What’s In Bella Hadid’s “Perfect Bite”

TheYou would think that, being a Bella myself, I’d have some sort of Bella telepathy that allows me to read Bella Hadid’s mind. However, I unfortunately do not; all my name ever did for me was ensure I was the butt of every Twilight-related joke during my teens. I digress—right now I’m here to talk about Bella Hadid’s “perfect bite” because, for the life of me, I can’t figure out what’s in it.

Typically, a model’s diet sounds pretty unappealing to me. I spend my days snacking on a bizarre-but-satisfying balance of charcuterie and fast food, so I definitely think that my diet is a little, um, different from Hadid’s. That said, I couldn’t help but notice her recent Instagram Story, a repost of her pal Jorden Bickham, Vogue.com’s Executive Fashion Editor, snacking on what Bickham refers to as “bites by bella.”

“If u know, u know. The perfect bite. Only . Bites by bella in collaboration with JB g stop United,” Bella wrote beneath the photo—and immediately I wanted to know more. If Hadid feels confident enough to refer to this snack as ~the perfect bite~ then I want to try it too, damnit. This is Gigi’s vodka sauce all over again, people!!!

Courtesy of Bella Hadid/Instagram.

Being the hard-hitting journalist I am, I turned to the StyleCaster team to help me dissect Bella’s perfect bite. However, we weren’t able to land on a definite ingredient breakdown. While our social media and entertainment editors believed passionately that the white schmear was cream cheese, the three of us could not decide on the bite’s base. Crostini? A bagel?? A Bagel Crisps chip??? All strong guesses, none of which we could whole-heartedly confirm.

Then, our fashion writer really threw me for a loop, pointing out the white schmear beneath the mysterious bread base. Another layer of cream cheese? Something with a more solid casing, like brie? Another friend asserted that it didn’t look like “real bacon” and I slowly started to spin out of control.

Does it actually matter what Bella Hadid’s perfect bite is? No, but I’d certainly like to know. It could be my favorite new snack! Until she gives us some concrete answers, catch me filling up my grocery cart with all of the following to investigate in the name of hard-hitting journalism: bacon, turkey bacon, cream cheese, brie, avocado, bagels, Bagel Crisps and crostini.